I made the solemn oath with my wife today…. “No More Lost.” Of course I’m referring to the television series that insists on providing incremental nothingness each 45 minutes it sucks from your life, while continuing to drag you along by the short and curlies as you hope the next episode reveals some semblance of closure… but it doesn’t. And yes, in case you’re a movie buff that did come out in 2004 and yes, I am that behind the curve when it comes to watching television.
But a bigger issue is at work here, and that’s dedication. I have no shortage of things to dive into, an MS in Computational Finance homework that’s due in one week, a business idea that has traction that needs tens of hours of dedication to even get a product I can put in front of someone, reaching out to those that are close to me, training my dogs so they stop attacking ankles when someone new walks in the room, meditation to improve my mindfulness as I move through my day … the list goes on. So why then, do I insist on dedication 20 hours to a mindless activity of watching a pointless television show?
The only thing I can come up with… is to forget. Forget the responsibilities that weigh down on me, forget the inadequacies
constantly poking me around what I haven’t achieved but should have, forget that I feel lost around where I’m going in life, and again… the list goes on.
Perhaps most alarming is that my life seems to be the constant struggle to move forward from the place that I am through dedication or the mindless attempt to forget where I am in this moment. Damnit, I need to keep working on that infographic sketch…..